So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Woke up to I'm AWESOME written in purple crayon all over my walls. I love drunk me
Randomize
