I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
If you are breathing, I want you at your house. No non-breathing-related excuses.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
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