I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize