I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I just want to drink cheap wine and throw my bra at an aging singer songwriter
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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