Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
