you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
