sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
From what I hear, her blowjob factory was runninng at full capacity this weekend.
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
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