wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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