Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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