So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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