its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
