just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Just because you're using the Hipstamatic app for your nude photo taking, it doesn't make your drunken blowjob pics any classier.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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