He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
We smell like vodka and hangover
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