The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Pictures of drunk me in a bike helmet are like McDonald's collectible toys. There's sooo many, but NO ONE has seen all of them.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
Randomize
