She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize
