So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
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