I'm sorry my penis didn't work
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
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