chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Succesfully slept on the roof at work for 3.5 hours without getting caught. I need a promotion
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
I swear I was in Legend of Zelda Twilight Princess and American Ninja Warrior at the same time. I'm never getting high while rock climbing again.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Randomize
