I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
