Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
Randomize