He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
