They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
i just ate a whole pizza and threw it back up in the time span of 13 minutes. give me the number to guiness book of world records.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
