I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
