we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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