Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Randomize
