There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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