Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She was crying, alone at a college bar. It would have been rude NOT to try and show my penis to her.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
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