You tried to poop in the sink last night.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
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