party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
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he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
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