day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize
