It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
Just paid for that girls abortion on my dad's black card. I feel like P-Diddy.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize