had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Randomize
