Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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