Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
