I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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