Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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