please come you make the beer taste better
Did you just see the Batmobile???
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Randomize
