So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
