Gonna get hammered and start online dating men in prison. But... only the ones who get out within two years.
Girl's gotta have her standards.
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Randomize
