nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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