we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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