i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize