What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
There are huge fuckin pieces of palm tree in the road. what a road hazard. as i sit here and text you as i swerve to miss them
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Randomize
