Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
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