Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
