Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
