It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Randomize
