It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
I was dreaming of a parallel reality and in the dream I just looked up at my present self and was like "you're high, man"
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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