if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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