You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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