im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
